Inane Banter

News, Now With Wings

Today’s Belfast Telegraph has an article highlighted on the front page

Are We Guided By Angels?

The article is on page 22 but I, without looking, can help answer their question plus other similar ones.

No, nor demons, no he’d never fit down a chimney, a rabbit isn’t going to hide chocolate eggs, you won’t go blind, yes newspapers did used to try and contain some semblance of fact.

Inane Banter

Just One More Thing

When a crime is committed you often see the neighbours of the criminal interviewed by the local news channel.

He was ever so quiet. You never think he’d do such a thing.

He’d never hurt a fly.

However even Columbo couldn’t have dragged this one out for the full hour.

Ex-mayor Ian Stafford charged with stealing women’s underwear

It’s hard to think of a face that looks more likely to steal knickers.

If you asked a class of 4 year olds what a pant thief would look like they would scribble a stick-man with that face.

A policeman asked to pick the most grundie-stealing feature for each part from his identikit box would construct that face.

If a photo of that face were fired into space, six million years from now a crystal based life-form would look at it’s unfamiliar shape and deduce it was from a creature that took undercrackers without permission.

To be honest it’s the mayor part that I find more shocking than the pant stealing.