When a crime is committed you often see the neighbours of the criminal interviewed by the local news channel.
He was ever so quiet. You never think he’d do such a thing.
He’d never hurt a fly.
However even Columbo couldn’t have dragged this one out for the full hour.
Ex-mayor Ian Stafford charged with stealing women’s underwear
It’s hard to think of a face that looks more likely to steal knickers.
If you asked a class of 4 year olds what a pant thief would look like they would scribble a stick-man with that face.
A policeman asked to pick the most grundie-stealing feature for each part from his identikit box would construct that face.
If a photo of that face were fired into space, six million years from now a crystal based life-form would look at it’s unfamiliar shape and deduce it was from a creature that took undercrackers without permission.
To be honest it’s the mayor part that I find more shocking than the pant stealing.