Not just a Christmas hate today but it has got much worse in the run up to Christmas. Here is an open letter to <insert stupid brand here>
Dear <insert stupid brand here>,
Yes I would like to enter your competition and/or get your discount.
What I would NOT like to do is give you access to lots of juicy details about me, advertise the existence of you to all my friends, risk yet another privacy meltdown and allow you to bombard me with shite until the day I die.
So it is with great regret I won’t “Like” you on Facebook. Nor will I allow you to pollute my twitter feed or any other desperate attempt to get your claws on my social media information. I really don’t want your shiny bauble that much. Don’t worry, I’m sure there are plenty of moronic teenagers who will quite happily let you in on their crappy lives. It will probably involve buying boots that look like they belong to imbecilic spacemen and making their heads look like it has 6 times as much hair as it really does. You get all you deserve.
Not yours,
Mr Fatuous