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Washing and Irony
Category: Inane Banter
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Advent of Hate 2011 – Christmas Day
Last night I planned Christmas dinner with military precision.
Today those plans probably are probably lying in tatters. The turkey is probably dangerously undercooked, somebody will be allergic to cranberry and the Christmas pudding is probably trying to seize control of Libya.
Merry Christmas everyone!
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Advent of Hate 2011 – Day 24
Why does Santa drink sherry and eat mince pies? Why can’t he drink tequila slammers and eat kebabs instead?
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Advent of Hate – Day 23
Dear CBeebies presenters, the sight of four fully grown adults pretending to be excited that there are only two sleeps until Christmas is really quite sickening. More to the point when did things start getting measured in nights rather than days?
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Advent of Hate – Day 22
The world is not coming to an end, I repeat the world is not coming to an end.
I can only assume that people think that judging by everyone panic buying of three months worth of food in my nearby supermarket today.
I checked, they are only closed on Christmas day itself. Still, it would be stupid not to buy three carts full of food to cover for the one day the supermarket is closed wouldn’t it?
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Advent of Hate 2011 – Day 21
Today’s entry is best explained in audio.
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Advent of Hate 2011 – Day 20
Work’s Secret Santa today. Presents you don’t want from people you don’t know. Wonderful!
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Advent of Hate 2011 – Day 19
One thing we must be aware of is how difficult this time of year is for the elderly. Spare a thought for poor Kim Jong-il who has died of “physical and mental over-work.”
Still, it’s the way I want to go, a corrupt, insane ruler governing a country with an iron fist and a water park.
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Advent of Hate 2011 – Day 18
I’d just finished writing today’s entry when a big dog came along and ate it.
If it helps, the dog had tinsel in it’s collar and was barking the tune to little donkey.
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Advent of Hate 2011 – Day 17
I was sitting looking through the traditional Christmas copy of the radio times. Despite ready access to a video shop and the internet I still like to see what films are on over Christmas. I easily saw ten films I’d like to see.
Then I remembered I’ve still got about ten films to watch from last Christmas and the Christmas before.
Films I wanted to see but not wanted to see enough to go and see at the cinema or on DVD. Or apparently enough to press a button on the remote.